I’m writing a book! Did you hear? I’m writing a book! A bonafide, original content book! And I’m going to publish it. All by myself.

That’s right. No agent. No publisher. No distributor. No PR machine. No query letters or manuscript submissions or external validation. I’m doing it by my own damn self.

Recently a friend mentioned something to me that made me firm up my decision to do this on my own.  She pointed out that the sample of the manuscript I sent her was in the wrong font and spacing for agents to read and that they would likely just throw it out without giving it a chance. She was being kind in pointing it out but the thing that struck me is, fuck that! I like the font I write in.  I use it because I like to read it and how it looks.  I really don’t give a flying fuck if someone doesn’t like it.  That’s a stupid reason not to read something.

Maybe it’s ego, maybe it’s arrogance, maybe it’s just that the system of publishing is so broken I don’t possess the energy to try to think about going through the process.  So I’m doing it myself.  Here are my reasons in a nut shell.  (Look it’s a list!  I’m learning about marketing!  Thanks Novel Pub!)

  1. I believe in my story. I believe in it and I don’t need anyone to tell me it’s worthy.  Every time someone likes it, I beam, but that doesn’t mean I need validation to know I’ve created something special.
  2. I love my job. I work form home running my own business, take care of my kidlets and have a pretty blissful life.  If I made a million dollars on The Sand Storm Chronicles that would be awesome, but I don’t think I’d stop working even then.  I have clients I care about and who rely on me and the work I do feeds me.  I’m in a great place where I don’t need to do one or the other and want to do both.  This gives me the freedom to not worry about my future career or income (although it certainly would help!) and just do what I believe in.
  3. I have abnormally thick skin. I’ve gotten bad reviews before, I’ve had people tell me to give up on what I want to do and have even been told I was ruining my life due to the choices I make.  Somehow I still do what I want, never give up and haven’t ruined my life yet.  So give me your best shot.  I really don’t care.
  4. I’m slightly obsessive. (Stop laughing!  Slightly is the right word!  Shut up!) All of the marketing and hustling I need to do for this to work I would do anyway.  I don’t see myself sitting back and having a PR team just do it all.  It would be nice to have the help but I can do a lot myself and have great support and resources.  Hell David Beem and I are cross-pollinating our marketing already and he’s been a huge source of support and encouragement.
  5. I have a team that believes in me.  From my husband, Best Girl and father who are constantly asking When can I read more?? to my pre-reading super BETAs to all of the wolfies out there, I have people who believe in me.  This means more than anyone could know and gives me the courage and ego to give this a go.
  6. I’m selfish.  For good or bad it’s true.  I’m a controlling obsessive selfish loon.  I don’t want someone else to approve the cover art.  I want to!  I don’t want someone else to negotiate discounts.  I want to set the price.  I don’t want someone taking a cut of what I’ve worked so hard for.  I want it all.
  7. Money.  While this isn’t specifically about making money for me there’s certainly a part of that.  As an Indie Publisher I will make 70-80% of the profits.  As a traditional writer I would make 12-30%.  Granted I would have more backing and MIGHT be one of the people who gets their books on shelves in the front of the store but with the climate of the publishing world today and the rise of ebook sales I’m just not feeling like I’ll get the kind of support that will make this worth it.
  8. I am realistic about what I am writing. I don’t fool myself into thinking I’m the next Michael Crichton.  I know I’m not.  I mean come on!  Have you read Consumed by Love?  I’m proud of it sure, but grocery store check out line material it’s not!  The Sand Storm Chronicles isn’t horror or erotica but it is raw and it is intended for adults.  I will never be what you buy at the airport for the flight home or pick up at the beach.  I’m ok with that.  If my books take off and that happens; awesome.  However, without a major PR campaign, and maybe even then, that simply isn’t going to happen.
  9. I already own a company that is healthy, thriving in fact, and can easily do the business side of this.  My business has sustained my and my family for years.  My husband started it in 1999 when he came to live with me in Brooklyn NY and we have been making money through various ventures on our own for over a decade.  So now, Fighting Monkey Press shall have its day!

So I will take this thing I am proud of, I will work it and shape it and mold it into something amazing, and I won’t try to change it or force it into a mold someone else wants it to fit.  I will listen to the experts and my advisers and rework, re-imagine and revise.  I will make sure it’s as perfect as humanly possible and then I will let it fly.

Unless of course I change my mind 🙂

Are you publishing?  Agent?  Publishing House?  Indie?  Self with CreateSpace/Lulu? Why did you decide on that avenue?  Do you think I’m nuts going it alone?

Pavarti’s Website


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